32isthenew25.com

I can't even remember the last time I read news this exciting:

According to Beyonce -- and thanks to [perhaps dubious, but who am I to judge or care?] hard evidence obtained by Media Take Out -- 32 is the new 25!

Apparently someone from the Texas Department of Health faxed a copy of Miss B's official birth certificate to the gossip site which, if the document is accurate, indicates that Beyonce is actually-- well, she's just OLD. 32 to be precise!

[Is that big enough to read? I'm thinking not, so you should probably just check their site.]

So even though Beyonce has [potentially] been revealed as a [potential] bearer of false witness, the good news -- or at least what I'm spinning as good news -- is that if Beyonce is 25, I'm... 17! [Why is math so hard?!] I'm 17! I'm 17! Gosh-- I can't wait to buy porn and vote! This is the best day ever!



Good day and Godspeed, youngin'!

Serious Hottness!!

It's been ages -- quite literally, and for that I am truly sorry -- since I've even had a spare moment to update my blog. However, that all changes now, because Christmakwanzakah came early this year. And so did I.

Today's obsession is fantasy made flesh in the form of exquisite French figure skater turned husband-of-my-dreams, Brian Joubert. The man can do three quads in one routine, so my infatuation and enthusiam are totally justifiable-- and what's even better is that it's all in a completely acceptable, sportslike "isn't his athleticism positively fascinating" sort of way. Anyhow, the clip is utterly ridiculous, and yet somehow ridiculously hott, all at the same time. Behold him in all his glory:



I hope you enjoy this tasty tid-bit. I know I will be... for the rest of my life. Especially when we get married. So back off! He's mine, okay!?



Good day and Godspeed, fellow purveyors of figure skating!